A Very Mad, Mad Hatter’s Tea Party!

I know, I know!! I have been a bad Frogge!! It has been exactly one week since I have posted last and I don’t even have that good of an excuse as to why I have been so M.I.A. (Except for the fact that there was a four day period where I literally just did not go home… and therefore was not by my computer.) Anywhoo… Let’s not waste time, let’s get down to business… 

The Frogge thinks that parties are very important. Especially because you only live once, right? And in these times of ‘economic unrest’ or whatever you want to call it, there is nothing better than getting together with some of your friends and having some good, old fashioned fun. Sadly, summer is almost over (boo)… Today is August 5th, and  The Frogge doesn’t even know where summer has went. So what does that mean? It means if you haven’t thrown a summer celebration yet you have about four weeks left to throw the most kick butt Mad Hatter’s Tea Party E-V-E-R… and for those of you who aren’t natural hosts… The Frogge will tell you exactly how to do this! Don’t worry, its easy… and… your friends will love you (more than they already do!) 

Why a very mad, Mad Hatter’s tea party, you may ask? Because everyone loves Alice in Wonderland… Plus! The new Alice in Wonderland directed by Tim Burton is coming out (kind of) soon… sooo this theme is highly appropriate… (Let’s just hope that Tim Burton does not mess up Alice in Wonderland like he messed up Charlie and the Chocolate Factory… because that was just creepy and Johnny Depp seemed more like a pedophile than Willy Wonka… strange since normally JD can do no wrong.) 

No one is cooler than the Mad Hatter! And The Frogge means no one! (Okay, maybe Alice... but that's it!)

No one is cooler than the Mad Hatter! And The Frogge means no one! (Except maybe for Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter... we will find out when the movie comes out!)

The first step to throwing a really great party is making a guest list. This may sound obvious but do not invite people who suck. People who suck will ruin your party. Only invite people who you really want to invite, people who have good energy, people who will add something to the atmosphere, people who will bring a bottle of champagne! 

After your guest list is complete, I suggest sending out real invitations in the mail. Why? Because facebook invitations are lame-o. They are boring, impersonal, and since most people get a few of them a day… they kind of get disregarded or not taken very seriously. On the other hand, snail mail is awesome! Think about it, when was the last time you got a real letter in the mail? A year ago? 5 years ago? In 1994? Getting a real letter in the mail is pretty much as exciting as Christmas morning… so send out real invites! Common sense suggest that If people get excited about the invitation, it will make them more excited for the actual party. (If you want to get really into the Mad Hatter’s theme, there is a company called “All Things Alice.” They make really nice blank note cards … you can order a box of them on Amazon.com for $11.70. They look like this… 

"All Things Alice" die-cut note cards

"All Things Alice" die-cut note cards

Okay, moving along, once you have picked out your invitations you need to write them (duh!) This is what The Frogge would say in her invite: Dear (Insert name of guest here)… The Frogge cordially invites you to Wonderland conveniently located at (insert address of party here) on (insert date and time here.) “Do not be late for this very important date,” as the White Rabbit said! Please RSVP at (insert phone # here) or OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! 

I would “strongly encourage” that everyone wear some kind of a hat… after all this is a Mad Hatter’s tea party! I suggest to have this party on a Sunday afternoon, around 3 p.m. works nice… and I also suggest having it outside in a garden, if you can. If you don’t have a garden or access to an outdoor space… maybe a park would work? Being outside always adds something nice to any party. 

There is nothing cuter than cute girls in cute hats... or bows!

There is nothing cuter than cute girls in cute hats... or bows!

Okey dok… let’s talk decoration. Decoration is highly important because it reinforces the theme of your party and also sets the mood and creates atmosphere… I think there are mainly four elements to a party (1. the food and drinks 2. the people at the party 3. the decoration/location and 4. the music.) That said, 25% of the success of your party relies on decor! So I am just going to throw out a ton of ideas and you can pick and choose, mix and match as many of them as you want…

1. You need teacups and saucers! This is a tea party, so teacups are pretty key. Whether or not they are a set, or completely mismatched is up to you. Personally, I like when all the cups and saucers are mismatched… because this is a Mad Hatter’s tea party… we are not having a high tea with the Queen of England. If you do not have any teacups and would like to make this type of a party and are on a budget check out the salvation army stores, thrift stores, vintage stores, TJ Max, Marshalls, Century 21… all those places have cheap teacups… throw ’em in the dishwasher, and you are good to go!  

2. If you have the party outside, bring out furniture… couches, tables, chairs, lamps, mirrors, candles with candle holders, a hat rack (if any of your guests want to take their hat off.) This furniture is a reference to when Alice is falling down the rabbit hole… there is a ton of furniture in there… Also, when Alice has tea with the Mad Hatter, they are sitting outside in a garden, but at a long table… 

See! Lots & lots of furniture!

See! Lots & lots of furniture!

3. You can put out red roses… real ones, fake ones… whatever you like… or! You can buy white roses and paint them half red… this is a reference to when the cards are painting the roses red… Whether you put them in vases or scatter them around, it’s up to you… 

The Queen she likes 'em red!

The Queen she likes 'em red!

4. Get a pack of cards and scatter them around… put them face up… this is clearly a reference to the cards pictured above… 

5. You can get a croquet set and play croquet… You would be surprised as to how many places sell croquet sets including the Sports Authority… but also try ebay for a better deal. It’s also always nice to have some sort of activity at a party as well… everybody loves a little friendly competition… think beer pong, but classier… 

Who wouldn't want to spend a nice Sunday afternoon playing croquet?

Who wouldn't want to spend a nice Sunday afternoon playing croquet?

… When The Frogge had her own very mad, Mad Hatter’s tea party… she also set up a badminton net… SO FUN!

A little friendly competition can get intense... especially when you are playing in sundresses!

A little friendly competition can get intense... especially when you are playing in sundresses!

 5. Skeleton keys are everywhere now… they are easy to find… put skeleton keys all around as a reference to when Alice is locked in the room and talking to the doorknob… remember…  first she is too small to reach the key, then she is too big to fit through the door…

Alice: I simply must get through! Doorknob: Sorry, you're much too big. Simply impassible. Alice: You mean impossible? Doorknob: No, impassible. Nothing's impossible.

Alice: I simply must get through! Doorknob: Sorry, you're much too big. Simply impassible. Alice: You mean impossible? Doorknob: No, impassible. Nothing's impossible.

6. Put little tags on all of your food that says “Eat Me” & put little tags on all of your drinks that say “Drink Me.” 

"There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like telescopes: this time she found a little bottle on it, ('which certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck of the bottle was a paper label, with the words 'DRINK ME' beautifully printed on it in large letters.

"There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like telescopes: this time she found a little bottle on it, ('which certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck of the bottle was a paper label, with the words 'DRINK ME' beautifully printed on it in large letters.

7. Get a hookah! This is a reference to the caterpillar! And smoking hookah is really fun… I suggest apple flavored tobacco, it is a neutral flavor that most people like… 

Caterpillar: Who... are... you? Alice: Why, I hardly know, sir. I've changed so much since this morning, you see. Caterpillar: No, I do not C, explain yourself. Alice: I'm afraid I can't explain myself, you see, because I'm not myself.

Caterpillar: Who... R ... U? Alice: Why, I hardly know, sir. I've changed so much since this morning, you see. Caterpillar: No, I do not C, explain yourself. Alice: I'm afraid I can't explain myself, you see, because I'm not myself.

Those are some ideas that I came up with… I am sure there are more and if you want to come up with some other ideas yourself, buy a copy of Alice in Wonderland and skim over the pages to get inspired… you never know what you will think of… But moving along, lets talk about the food and drinks…

Drinks: Cleary, you need tea, but since it is summer, it is hot… for obvious reasons go with iced tea… put fresh slices of lemon inside a pitcher of iced tea. You can also mix iced tea with lemonade to make an Arnold Palmer (yum!)… I like variety so I would also have a strawberry lemonade in a pitcher with fresh slices of lemon and strawberries… you could also go with something a little bit less traditional like limeade… which is so good… PS- strawberry lemonade with vodka is amazing… as is limeade. If you have this party on a Sunday afternoon, you could also have “brunch” drinks such as mimosas and bloody Mary’s… don’t forget the celery stalk! 

Food: It is a tea party, so you need to have [some of] the traditional tea party foods such as… scones with jams, butter,and Devonshire cream, little sandwiches… especially cucumber sandwiches… smoked salmon sandwiches are popular too, breads, cakes, tarts, and little delicate cookies… 

Yum... The Frogge likes to cook... And then eat... Who doesn't?

Yum... The Frogge likes to cook... And then eat... Who doesn't?

But because this is a Mad Hatter’s tea party, I think you need to add in some untraditional tea party foods as well… just go with things that people love… go with whatever you love… pick stuff that you are really happy to give to people… I would suggest making a mozzarella caprese salad (don’t forget to garnish with basil!) Maybe some guacamole! Everyone loves guacamole (don’t forget to get some chips to serve it with.) For the skinny bitches, put together a vegetable platter with some dips… you can have a cream based dip like ranch if you want… but also have hummus incase any of your guests are vegan. Speaking of hummus, you can make a nice platter of hummus garnished with olives and paprika served with pita bread or pita chips… If you want to do this party but have a question feel free to email me at TheFrogge@gmail.com… I would be glad to help you.

Lastly… don’t forget the music (and avoid top 40 songs!) People hear that crap all day, everyday… when they come to your party, put on something different… It should be like, “Wow… I love this song and I haven’t heard it in so long!” or “Wow, I love this song… what is it?” During my Mad Hatter’s tea party I put on Morcheeba… they are amazing… specifically their album called Big Calm… it’s addictive. 

That’s about it… I think I have told you everything you need to know to be a successful host… now go get ’em tiger!

RIBBIT OF THE DAY: Cirque Du Rock is tonight at the Highline Ballroom! Tickets are $12 at the door and it is hosted by my lovely friend NC Shuva… it is going to be nuts… Come check it out… Doors open at 8 p.m. 

TONIGHT AT 8 PM!! BE THERE...

TONIGHT AT 8 PM!! BE THERE...

This is what Cirque Du Rock has to say about itself… “Imagine the wildest night you’ve had in your life – go ahead, take a minute. Got it? Clear in your mind? Now multiply that into an infinite loop and you might understand a tenth of the essence of Cirque du Rock. It is night of complete extravagance, where music and visual arts are combined to leave you dizzy, spellbound, and thirsty for more. Every sort of genre of music is fused together under the umbrella of heavy rock: it IS self-willed chaos. The bill is packed with amazing stage performers and sideshows including magicians, belly dancers, stilt walkers, fire eaters, and LIVE tattooing and piercing. All these elements come together to create a carnival-like atmosphere, a turbulent ride for all five senses. This is about raising questions, turning heads, and daring to blur social values. Looking for an average night on town? Go somewhere else. Want to experience a typical rock show? Can’t help you. Cirque du Rock will definitely get some people worried and some people charged. Where will you be when the debauchery goes down?”

WOO, SOUNDS INTENSE… AND THE FROGGE WILL BE THERE TO TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT TOMORROW!

Love your friend,

                              The Frogge ❤

 

PS- TO BECOME A FRIEND OF THE FROGGE ON FACEBOOK CLICK HERE!

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3 Responses to “A Very Mad, Mad Hatter’s Tea Party!”

  1. yikes!!!!! this was brilliant !!!! worth waiting for!!!

  2. Testimony: I received one of these lovely invites in the mail and it put a smile smile smile on my face face face. The too cute cards with The Frogge’s lovely hand writing (The Frogge writes surprisingly well for someone that doesn’t have opposable thumbs 😉 were the perfect detail to a perfectly amazing Mad Hatter’s Tea Party (as we know, I didn’t get to go, rhyme time! BUT since it was thrown by The Frogge, I know it was amazing. Welcome Back from your hiatus!!! Much Love, CRG

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